Delusions of Grandeur

                                              I’ve been sick all weekend.

Yup.

Fever. Cough that makes me feel like I’m hacking up a lung. Sleep. Fluids. And lots of just sitting there.

I remember when I was little and I was sick, I would go to my Nana’s house while my younger brother would be at school. I would sleep in the guest bedroom, once my uncle’s room. I would get orange juice, and toast with a huge slab of butter on it, and hot tea with extra sugar. And in the afternoons, after I had slept most of the morning, I would get to sit downstairs and watch cartoons- nurse’s orders. Then I would secretly flip it to the channel that played all the old TV shows: I Love Lucy, Laverne and Shirley, and the Dick Van Dyke show. You know, the classics. I dreamt of a time I would live like that: stomping grapes for wine like Lucy, dancing with Dick like Mary, and hoping the door wouldn’t fly open from a random neighbor needing something- Oh Squiggy.

I loved those shows. More than any show I can think of today. I mean don’t get me wrong I’ll sit down and watch a good marathon of Parks and Rec or How I Met Your Mother, sure. But the originals are definitely where it’s at.

After passing through the stages of feeling like death, actually dying and then coming back to life, I have rested—nurses orders. And I have Netflix binged a little bit. Only a little. But I’ve put it to good use. I’ve watched my classics.

I’ve watched the Dick Van Dyke show, Breakfast at Tiffany’s, to name a couple. I don’t want to sound like a total lush just sitting here doing nothing. I’ve actually written nearly fifty pages of a manuscript I’ve been working on for some time. Now to edit the delusions will be quite interesting.

Today I finally feel well enough to sit up and breathe. Hopefully without too much effort, but I can see outside with the fog covering the trees, and the orange leaves, but my mind keeps wandering to those black and white film screens projecting off of my computer.

IMDB

IMDB

How beautiful those people are, just loving life. Things were simple. They said what they felt, but in the most poetic and becoming way one could recite such words. Clothes were pressed, dishes stacked, coffee was small (which would scare me), jokes were funny not crude, and even when they made fun of each other they never meant to be mean, if they crossed the line, apologies followed.

Problems were solved, not thrown away. Issues resolved, not tossed to the side only to be swept under the rug later.

Dick Van Dyke danced his way into our hearts with his goofy smiles and affection for Mary Tyler Moore.

IMDB

Gosh darn, I want a love like theirs: simple, beautiful, poetic.

Or like Holly Golightly and Paul. The back and forth, the awkward yet, adorable flirtation that kept their relationship together.

They had fun.

Delusions of grandeur.

IMDB

It was a beautiful time being sick, actually. I liked reminiscing on times I was never in, and experiencing a little flashback of my own childhood.

So anytime I’m sick, I’ll follow nurses orders.